on your permanent record
Thursday, October 17th, 2002
1.
Me: Did you have fun in the science museum?
Ross (my nephew, aged 4): Were you with me?
Me (confused): Yes, I’ve been with you all day.
Ross: Then you know what kind of a day I’ve had.
2.
Ian: I’m inventing television!
Me: We’ve already got one. It’s verra naice.
3.
Kathryn: We stayed in the Standard Hotel.
Jeremy: Where the rooms are one metre wide and high. And everything weighs a kilogram.